Recently the boys (in this case referring to Matt Marshall and Colin Fallowfield) and I went shopping for an upcoming Theatre Bassaris show (more on that next month). After hours of trekking through the city in search of chairs, the perfect apparently non-existent chairs, our feet were freezing, our spirits a little low, and our stomachs were rumbling… we were also far from home.

I'm not often in the east end of the city, which is a damn shame I admit, but we decided to trek up to the Danforth to check out a little café that opened last week. Armed with the name, the address, and no sense of direction, I led our tired party to the corner of Danforth and Jones.

Approaching the café, we see a sign out front that says “Hot soup and sandwiches,” with emphasis placed on the 'hot.' Let me tell you, after 5 hours of walking around in the slush, those words were akin to “Heaven, just step inside.” So we did, and it was.

The atmosphere at Teatree is calming. Serenely green walls, jazz crooning from the speakers, and not a hipster in sight! I have to admit, despite my love for coffee shops, I can’t stand cafés filled with scenester teens clamoring for attention, typing loudly on laptops, and drinking over-sugared over-priced coffee-like beverages. This is an adult café. I don’t mean that kids aren’t welcome, a small family with wee ones were coming in as we were on our way out, but there’s a sense of maturity about the place. And not “mature,” conveyed in a way that makes you feel like you’re hanging out with tea grannies… the atmosphere is just right. Between the reclaimed bricks, wood accents, and unique mugs its hard not to fall a little bit in love with the place.

If you’re a theatre person, you’ll fit right in. As we sat chatting about the sad state of not finding chairs for our show, the only other conversation in the room (I apologize to whoever it was that I eavesdropped on) was about theatre. It’s funny how the city brings people together…

But I digress. We order immediately, chatting with Ian who was manning the counter. Last time I saw him he was huddled in the corner installing the bar that now looks out the front window. The place has come a long way! It takes on more charm when you know how much work has gone into it. And they run the place like it’s effortless! Erin Pim, the owner and chef, was busy in the back filling orders. She comes out to tell us the soup of the day and we’re immediately convinced. I don’t think I’ve ever ordered something so enthusiastically.

“I’m pretty sure they could’ve sold us anything that was hot,” Matt remarks, which is true. I still can’t feel my feet, but my hands have thawed enough to hold a cup of coffee. Which is great, mainly because it’s warm. It’s isn’t phenomenal, but it’s much better then the junk at the Coffee Time across the street. As it turns out the soup is great not just because it’s hot, but because it’s delicious and filling. All the food at Teatree is filling. I made the mistake of going for a late lunch on a day when I had a dinner date… don’t do that, unless you want your date to be disappointed that you’re not hungry for hours upon hours.

The food verdict? Delicious. The boys and I all ordered different items so we could experience as much of the menu as possible (we always have business in mind…), and I would therefore highly recommend: the chunky hummus sandwich, the brie and baked apple sandwich, and the tomato avocado one too! The menu consists of all homemade items (including the bread!), and specializing in vegan options. Every choice is like a good home-cooked meal your mother used to make - only better.

The place even has WiFi, though it seems a shame to litter such a charming place with laptops. If you find yourself on the Danforth this winter, bring a book and come find a little bit of summer warmth at Teatree Café. And yes, they actually have a tree.

Roncesvalles is littered with coffee joints, yet we’ve never ventured out there for our Caffeine-Buzzing purposes. What’s up with that? I don’t know, but it was something that needed to be rectified and rectified it certainly was. The Chief and I, we hopped on the 501 at Gladstone and got stuck in traffic. Shit, we could have walked to Roncesvalles in the time it took for that streetcar to lurch its way over there, and I can assure you that we were mighty surly when we finally made it. We walked into Tinto Coffee House and were delighted to find that this large, split-level café was not just one to be lost amongst the sea of like-minded small businesses along the quaint West End strip. Despite being only a few doors down from the more well-known-but-with-limited-seating-space, Cherry Bomb, Tinto manages to carve out a cool, DIY sort of niche in a heavily saturated area.

With ample seating space – including a few couches – readily available power outlets – thank Christ – and some fine eats and drinks, Tinto is a bright, warm and fuzzy kind of place that almost made me wish it was colder, so that I could justify getting a hot chocolate because it would be a great place to have one of those. But seriously folks, Tinto is great for hanging out and reading a book; it's inviting without being too overbearing (read, it has just the right amount of scuzz) and it has a real flavour of its own that keeps it from being like every other quaint and comfortable coffee shop. My favorite part was that on their fridge there was a sign that read "No Pop! Not Sorry!" - it made me chuckle something fierce, I can tell you.

My least favorite part about Tinto was that while WiFi is available, it is not the fastest or most reliable. It kept cutting out every few minutes, which ended up fucking some serious shit up on a couple of occasions. I still want to hang out there though, so I would suggest that if you make a special trip over to Tinto, be sure to bring a book and curl up in one of their sofas, rather than trying get any serious surfing done because that will not come easy for you as far as I can tell.

The layout of the place is great, I really dig the split-levels and the separate rooms with the bright red chairs and brick walls - it's all very lovely. The people that work there are super-nice and, most importantly, the coffee is pretty good. I didn't catch what they were packing, bean-wise, but I did enjoy it, in addition to my time there in general.

Fortunately for those of us enjoying our neighbourhood in vogue for the surely very brief time being, we can bring the East Side to us. Yes indeed, if you too find it painfully difficult, despite your best efforts, to escape the Dufferin-College-Ossington-WQW bubble, you only have to travel a very short distance out of your comfort zone to hit one of Leslieville’s favourite spots that I’ve never been to because I am so rarely in Leslieville, because earlier this year they put a new one on Spadina. Nice!

Dark Horse Espresso Bar’s second location, set up just a little ways North of Queen, is pretty tops. As someone with not a lick of sleep in him for some very long time and a bloodstream boiling over with caffeine as it is, my Latte from Dark Horse earlier this afternoon was truly the best cup of coffee I’ve had in hours. Equally nice!

Regardless of how hopped up I may or may not currently be, I am totally down with this latte, for serious, heck yes and so forth. A lot sweeter than a lot of local espressos, but certainly amongst the more flavourful - the Dark Horse folk even do that funky-fresh milk-art stuff that makes you not want to drink your coffee because it looks like there was love just blasted all over that motherfucker. But then you kind of forget all about that nonsense once you start drinking it and subsequently forget that it ever looked kind of cool once not too long ago. Sure enough your cup just ends up looking like every other: a brown, flaky stain near the rim and a tiny pool congealing near the bottom.

But I digress. Dark Horse: totally cool layout (taking into account space and vibes) and bombass coffee. Check. Lame-O wireless – on account of it’s not actually their wireless you’re using, rather you have several options available to you for stealing – that craps out on you every eight fucking seconds or whatever. They played “15 Step”, which I can certainly appreciate and there’s at least a point there. This review was hardly a review at all, scarcely. Indeed it was entirely the madcap ramblings of a man in desperate need of a nap. Nice!

I'm totally down for more Dark Horse in my immediate future, and maybe someday I'll even man up and venture out East to see which of the two I like better.

The Communal Mule
984 Dundas St. West

After trudging through the summer heat in Trinity Bellwoods Park, the last refreshment you'd think I'd want would be a hot cup of Joe. Well, I just happen to be insane and there just happened to be, on the north side of Dundas Street, just east of the park, a new coffee shop - The Communal Mule.

I just love when things just work out so well. I walked up to the counter by the lacquered tables and kitschy found objects and was delighted to bump into a chalkboard sign reading "All Fair Trade and Direct Trade Coffee" before ordering my latte for $3.75 and retreating to sit by the fan and survey the space.

An undoubtedly retro dentist light hovered over my table and a gigantic industrial orange clock - straight out of the dump - sat idly, unticking, on white walls adorned with other bizarre curiosities. A large black and white photo of an enthusiastic carpenter, a poster for Tod Browning's Freaks, people with laptops and books chatting and laughing, a huge fan and good tunes, what more could I ask for in a place to escape the heat?

Badass coffee. Oh yes, my latte was definitely badass. Brewing Intelligentsia or 49th parallel -I'm not sure which one I had - organic milk perfectly steamed, a nice bold edge to the espresso, a clean, fresh aftertaste. My companion, Max, grabbed a coffee which was also very good, freshly ground, sweet enough without being overstated. We walked out into the sun, hot beverages in hand, and instead of melting into pavement, felt rather refreshed and jovial. For a coffee shop that has only been around for two months (a tidbit told to me by the super friendly barista/owner) The Communal Mule has the atmosphere and ambiance of a local staple, offering great quality beans traded fairly or directly and some fun arty stuff to look at while you sip.

I will definitely be a new regular!

The Common
1071 College Street @ Gladstone

Just East of College and Dufferin resides the Common, which I have passed by many times in the morning to witness a teeming interior, but during the afternoon when things have calmed down I can stop in and claim a table for my own.

The Common is stamped on the front window in illustrious brown curves with thick panels of stained glass standing out above. I enter to find a fairly rustic, fairly worn down location: some old decaying signs adorn the walls, including an ancient “fresh home made Laura Secord Candies, for every occasion” and an old ice cream sign that may or may not have been salvaged from a garbage site. The old green counter is chipped and worn and the tattered, old red floor has certainly seen better days.

Behind the counter there are some antique one and two-dollar Canadian bills, some old postcards and photos, as well as some drawings obvious etched by children. Ivy has been artfully hung from nails attached by elastic bands and while there are not many seats, the one wall is lined with second hand wooden benches while small wooden chairs lie in every other space the shop has to offer. There are also four seats placed out front for customers to enjoy the summer air, sitting along College in the sunlight. The imperfect off-white walls seal the deal of the atmosphere, for therein lies the appeal of the Common: an authentic coffee shop that serves its customers faithfully, unabashed by the DIY shoddiness of the interior.

Behind the counter, above the tubs of coffee, children’s toys have been arranged for your viewing pleasure, a coffee shop that does not shy away from being playful. Along the front window some toys and books aimed at children are within reach, leading me to believe that the coffee shop is excessively child friendly.

Although the Common does not appear to have many victuals to offer, late in the day a cake and some cookies in jars on the counter are still available for your snacking needs. I order a latte that is served with water as opposed to milk, The lady serving it to me excessively friendly in an I LOVE NY t-shirt, allowing me to decide how high the water should rise to personalize the ratio of coffee to water. The dark roast, which I had black to be bold, was beautifully bitter, perking me up and dancing on the taste buds. The Wifi is plentiful, the atmosphere is excellent and I will surely return to replenish my caffeine stores when I get the chance

Comments

• July 16, 2009, Patrick Grant writes: ...isn't a latte with water just a cup of coffee? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills! Also, I want to visit this place. It sounds pretty wicked. Childrens toys and cookies are the way to my heart.

Linuxcafe
326 Harbord Street @ Grace

What the fuck is Linux anyway? I’ve had it (sort of) explained to me a number of times and I’m continually stalled by words that I don’t understand coupled with the speed at which they are delivered to me because everyone that’s into Linux is really, really excited about it. “Open Source,” “Kernel,” what the fuck is this jazz?

Whoa there, fella, I’m an English major: my knowledge of computers doesn’t go far beyond the fact that they compute things (or something to that extent). I can turn it on, I can browse with the best of them (or at least with the most decidedly mediocre of them) and I can sure as shit write up a mean Word document. Other than that, I would probably have better luck trying to read Ulysses while fucked out of my tree on mushrooms standing in the middle of the 401 than attempting to figure out even the most rudimentary computer-related procedures.

But I digress: what the fuck is Linux anyway?

These are the things I think of when I think of Linux: “DIY”, “They have a penguin for a mascot”, “It’s free” and to quote Alexander Keith’s ad men, “Those who like it, like it a lot.” That’s about it. Will I ever unearth the mysteries of the ethereal program (is it a program?) known as Linux? Dave, proprietor of the Linuxcafe on Harbord nearly burst blood vessels trying to drill it into my prose-padded skull, but oh reader, how I resisted! Poor man, I didn’t understand a darn word he said to me.

Ah, just as well. I suppose it is my fault for making a special trip to Grace and Harbord to check out a place called Linuxcafe. What could I possibly have expected, a passing relation to the kernel (nudge nudge, yeah?) and that would be about it? What I did stumble upon, according to Dave, is in fact the Linux collective’s North American headquarters. Alright!

Well, anyway, as an Operating System/Collective/Kernel/Program/Open Source Thingy (etc.), Linux escapes me like a pesky roadrunner, but as a coffee spot, Linuxcafe is damn charming. As the hub of operations for the Open Source Geek community of Toronto, and by extension, the universe, there are just as many glowing laptops presided over by as many geeks as you would expect, but oh, there’s so much more! In between the stacks and shelves of code books, toy penguins (plush and otherwise) and other assorted nerd paraphernalia, Harbord Street’s modest strip offers a fine little place for nerds and un-nerds alike to get together and share a latte with some interesting and cool people, while at once maybe learning a thing or two about Open Source. Brewing the Toronto staple, I Deal Coffee, which is now brewed, like, everywhere, Linuxcafe halts its trendy factor right there and goes into full gear with unbridled, spectacular kitsch that assaults you from all directions. In the fun, laidback sort of way you’d expect from a coffee shop with a computer theme.

I’m going to end this on a note that will sum up for you the vibe of Linuxcafe very cleanly and simply:

Ahem,

Linuxcafe serves a wide variety of cold cereal.

You see what I mean?

Bulldog Coffee
89 Granby Street @ Church

This coffee shop is actually really really close to my apartment. I heard about their pretty lattes and rad coffee a while ago, but was constantly put off by online reviews citing the terrible service and mean staff, leading me to take the streetcar all the way over to Zoots or set up shop at the beloved Jet Fuel. Who wants a java from a jerk?

I finally bit the proverbial bullet a week ago - remembering that the lovely Jet Fuel staff got shitty reviews from under-caffienated interweb stone-throwers - and hit up Bulldog for a latte and cookie, Mr. Associate in tow, expecting some cold shoulders and bad attitude. To my delight, there was none! This quaint little shop boasts an understated mod decor, cute bulldog pictures, big bright windows, and the nicest barrista I have ever met. When I approached the counter I was met with the most sincere smile ever from an undoubtedly teenaged youth and a stacked drink menu which sported all of the coffee lover's essentials. I ordered a latte, Mr. Associate grabbed a chai, and we picked out a chocolate chip cookie to share before sitting down beside a large window and critiquing the fare.

Steamed milk swirled to perfection

Man, the latte was so pretty I didn't even want to drink it! The steamed milk was swirled to perfection - something Bulldog Coffee touts as a standard of service. I was glad once I decided to deface the design, though - the coffee was just superb. It wasn't as light as a Jet Fuel latte, but it came pretty close; a subtle bitterness beneath perfectly steamed milk and a fresh, sweet earthiness to the grind. Paired with a badass chunky chocolate chip cookie that hailed back to Mom's kitchen, my tastebuds were overwhelmed with the refined homestyle flavour of Bulldog. It was fantastic! I also had the pleasure of sampling Mr. Associate's chai latte, which kicked the shit out of Starbucks' pre-packaged spiced tea, an extra hint of cinnamon (and nutmeg, I think, but I couldn't put my finger on it) gave it a unique and home-made flair which really impressed me.

The shop was a tad small, but they have a quaint little patio that opened up as we (and the rain) left for the afternoon. Sidestepping the kitsch, it's a sweet, simple little place to get a rad grind and enjoy some relaxed conversation. I'll definitely head back there soon to sit dumbly over the beautiful coffee-art until my latte gets cold.

Badass.

Ezra’s Pound
913 Dundas West @ Bellwoods

I have to say, I’ve never been totally convinced that Ezra Pound was all that messianic as he’s sometimes made out to be - fascism aside. Let’s be honest here, we all did some things we weren’t proud of during the war, but having made that clear, Ezra Pound always seemed like he’d be a pretty big douche even if he weren’t all up in Mussolini’s grill. I’m not sure if I was expecting to be treated to a cup of coffee with a side of Doom, or a room full of people speaking entirely in offhand Imagiste remarks in numerous languages, but I suppose it wasn’t that much of a surprise, now that I think of it, that all of the people at Ezra’s Pound were, like, the nicest people ever. Why shouldn’t they be? It is only a name after all and when asked, the owner, whose name happens to be Ezra, shrugged off my harsh line of questioning with a we-had-to-call-it-something chuckle and eye-roll.

It was almost overwhelming how abundantly nice everyone is at Ezra’s Pound; god damn. I ordered a latte and was in turn ordered to sit down only to have my coffee brought to me literally on a silver platter with a glass of water – charming! Actually it was kind of awkward, but I nevertheless appreciated the gesture. And the coffee itself was most delish; just the right amount of bitter and OH MY GOD THE GIRL JUST CAME BY AND TOPPED OFF MY WATER FROM A VINTAGE-LOOKING BOTTLE AND ASKED ME HOW MY COFFEE WAS, WILL THE QUAINTNESS NEVER END?!?!?!

“It was phenomenal,” I said, and she ambled off all smiley.

So according to the man Ezra, all of the countertops and tables and chairs and stuff are all made of recycled junk (I’m sitting on an old church pew right now, which is making me feel a little weird on account of being, you know, kind of a heathen and all – Ezra was all like JUSTTHINKOFIT-PEOPLEPRAYEDRIGHTWHEREYOU’RESITTING-PRAYED – weird) and there’s this naked mannequin in the corner that I guess is pretty cool. Also he was telling me about all of the organic milk and coffee that they use and his totally un-fascist approach to business and business ethics and if I hadn’t just met him half an hour ago, I would have probably given him a hug for being a friggin’ rad dude.

Anyway, Ezra’s Pound is a totally cool and highly recommended café where you can grab a badass cup of coffee on recycled furniture with some obscenely nice people and them head on over to Bellwoods park for a leisurely toss of the old Frisbee, which I know I could seriously go for right about now.

So go give Ezra a high-five and tell ‘em Curran sent ya.

Manic Coffee
426 College Street (College & Bathurst)

I must have seen this coffee shop from the streetcar window thousands of times before I actually ventured in - oddly, almost every time I ambled down to Sneak's for a heaping guilt-free platter of nachos, I eyed the dark closed shop and made disorganized mental notes to head over there for a latte. Heading back from work last week in the rain, I eyed the shop from a packed streetcar and finally made a point to hop off and stop in; burning out from my from my morning's large Americano and doused by a May storm.

Located across from Sneaky Dee's, Plaza Flamingo and one of the only goddamn Royal Banks close to my apartment, Manic Coffee has a sweet location and an even sweeter vibe, as I quickly learned upon entering. With mod decor that resists the we-want-to-be-indie-so-bad-we've-ended-up-looking-kitsch aesthetic, Manic's tasteful space sports natural palettes and an understated retro feel. With a totally stacked magazine rack at the front of the shop, exposed brick, soft music playing, and black and white framed photos adorning the walls, the whole vibe of the place is totally cool and relaxing, setting an inviting atmosphere that motivates patrons - new and regular - to the hit up the counter.

The staff was great - not too hip to be friendly, and ready to crack jokes and chat with the customers. I paid my $3.90, grabbed my latte (complete with beautiful steamed-milk design) and sat on the long bench at the front of the shop to sample their coffee. It was awesome. With a roast that was entirely full-bodied and bold without being bitter, the coffee had just the right amount of sweetness and a pleasantly bitter aftertaste. The milk was steamed to perfection, swirled into a perfectly symmetrical heart - a pretty drink for a stormy day.

At 5:00pm on Thursday when I hit up the shop, I was surprised to see that they still had an abundance of baked goodies, - muffins, croissants, sandwiches and wraps - as well as juices and water in a starbucks-esque case beside the counter. Considering that most independent coffee shops in Toronto only offer minimal snack-fare, if any, this shop is an awesome find for those of us who like juice with their java or a muffin with their mocha. Alright, I'll stop.

Manic has all the amenities of a chain coffee joint, but boasts the local feel and laid-back atmosphere of an indie op. I'd totally recommend checking it out.

White Squirrel
907 Queen Street West

Across the street from Trinity-Bellwoods, along one of the most happening strips of WQW - and for all your hipster needs in the same block as Type Books, Capsule Music, the only remotely trendy looking Fish and Chip joint I’ve ever seen and a dessert café whose name escapes me - White Squirrel keeps it real, for real. A split-level, starkly decorated Chillstravaganza with great tunes and even better cookies, this is far and away one of the better places in town to get your daily fill of good vibes. The simple and tasteful décor, featuring off-white walls almost entirely bare save for a gigantic vintage map of Toronto and an appropriately T-shaped communal table right bellow it, coupled with cool folks, free internet and great cookies, fosters positivity and creativity like Richmond fosters popped collars and crying girls. For me, there are few better environments in which to get my shit done than White Squirrel; their coffee is decent, but far from transcendent, but like I said, you’re going to go there for the Chillasuarus Rex of an atmosphere and the great cookies. If I could give a building a hug or a high-five, I would give white Squirrel a totally magnificent high-five or a pretty earth-shaking bearhug and I feel like if any building could reach out and give a person a hug or a high-five it would be White Squirrel. Plus, the big and aforementioned communal table pretty much forces you to talk to people, rendering the possibility of being an antisocial fuckwad null and void, which is nice, because I often feel like being an antisocial fuckwad and talking to some cool strangers always makes me feel like being less of one – bring forth the relaxing casual conversation! Bring forth the gingersnaps!

Editor's Note: They also have incredible brownies.